Seinfeld Quotes - The Mango

"Tub is love."
    - Jerry, in "The Mango"

"Nobody knows what to do. You just close your eyes, you hope for the best. I really think they're happy if you just make an effort."
    - Jerry, in "The Mango"

"Who's fakin'?"
    - Elaine, in "The Mango"

"That whole thing, the whole production, it was all an act?"
    - Jerry, after Elaine told him that she always faked it, in "The Mango"

"They've all been faking..."
    - Jerry, in "The Mango"

"The woman had an orgasm under false pretenses. That's sexual perjury!"
    - Jerry, in "The Mango"

"You know, I heard her screaming from my apartment. She woke me up a few times."
    - Kramer, admiring Elaine's ability to fake it, in "The Mango"

"I know how to press those buttons, buddy."
    - Kramer, in "The Mango"

"You know, I faked it."
    - Kramer, in "The Mango"

"This peach is sub-par."
    - Kramer, in "The Mango"

"You gotta stand behind your fruit."
    - Kramer, in "The Mango"

"What am I gonna do for fruit?!"
    - Kramer, starting to panic, in "The Mango"

"Give me another shot!"
    - Jerry, wanting another chance to make Elaine happy, in "The Mango"

"Fifteen minutes! I can make it happen!"
    - Jerry, pleading with Elaine, in "The Mango"

"Oh that Meryl Streep. She's such a phoney baloney!"
    - Jerry, in "The Mango"

"Can't you tell I'm upset?"
    "No, maybe you're faking!"
    - Elaine and Jerry, in "The Mango"

"They're mysterious little fellows, aren't they?"
    - Jerry, in "The Mango"

"If I give you money, would you go out and get me some fruit?"
    - Kramer to Jerry, after being barred from the fruit store, in "The Mango"

"They don't have a decent piece of fruit at the supermarket. The apples are mealy, the oranges are dry... I don't know what's going on with the papayas!"
    - Kramer, in "The Mango"

"I'm gonna make you a fruit list."
    - Kramer, after Jerry agrees to go to the fruit store, in "The Mango"

"I like mangoes."
    - Kramer, in "The Mango"

"I can't buy mangoes and plantains?"
    - Jerry, talking with a suspicious fruit store owner, in "The Mango"

"I've only got hundreds."
    - Kramer, asked for change, in "The Mango"

"This is like a taste explosion."
    - George, tasting his first mango, in "The Mango"

"Well well, if it isn't the first lady of the American theatre."
    - Jerry, to Elaine, in "The Mango"

"Alright, let's go. I'll give ya half an hour."
    - Elaine, letting Jerry have another shot, in "The Mango"

"We have to have sex to save the friendship."
    - Jerry, in "The Mango"